Reviewing The Joys of Motherhood

I really enjoyed reading The Joys of Motherhood. I really got a sense of what it must have been like to live in Ibuza and Lagos back then. Most striking about the book to me was how their society lived. When I first started reading the book I was shocked how all the men had several wives, and the term senior wife for the first wife the man had ever taken. I knew there were societies that had such practices but I had never read in depth about it. Reading this story really let me put myself in their society/tribe and put myself in their shoes.


Being a female I found myself through out my reading of the book having many objections, thoughts, and feelings in regards to how all the women were being treated. The women were so looked down upon and education for girls was seen as a waste. When a baby girl was born it was always such a "disappointment" to the fathers. Like the girls were worthless and only sons were the ones they should take pride in. One thing the fathers did like about the girls was when they married they received a handsome bride price. But the women were not even allowed to choose their own husband. The women were controlled almost totally by their husbands and or fathers.


The concept of strongly tied families was an important one to the characters tribes in this book. Families had a lot of expectations of their children, like the expectation and assumption that their male children were to take care take care of them. To me it almost seemed in the book that they only had children to eventually profit from them. An example is when towards the end of the story(pg.200-202) when Oshia is going to go to school in America, his father Nnaife becomes enraged by this and asks him when was going to take on his family responsibilities(which mean taking care of the rest of his siblings in the household). Oshia had no idea of these responsibilities and was puzzled by his fathers question, and he was even going to ask his father for monetary help. Nnaife disowned him and said he never wanted to see him again. Oshia's mother Nnu Ego felt the opposite it seems because she wanted to help her children as much as she could and wanted them to become as educated as they could.



If Ona and Nnu Ego had an opportunity for micro-finance I believe their stories could have had a different ending. For Ona if she could have started her own business it would have let her be self sufficient, which would have been good because she was always having to do as her father wished. A small business would have suited her well because she was very independent and strong willed in her ways of thinking.

As far as micro-financing with Nnu Ego it could have really changed her life for the better. She was already very ambitious as far as that she sold a few things in the market already. She worked very hard to sell what she could like collecting sticks to sell as firewood or selling cigarettes. But the trading she did do was never going to make her rich. With micro-financing she could have started a somewhat bigger business and could have had a more steady income coming in. She might have even been able to hire other women to work for her. Nnu Ego could have been able to make money to take care of her children with out having to worry about how much her husband would be bringing home and if it would be enough to cover everything. I think she would have been a much happier woman with her own successful small business.
And another note in the New York Times article it talked about how those in poverty spent too much money on candy and alcohol, then we see in the book how Nnaife spent lots of money on Palm wine. Money that could have gone towards food for the children or their schools fees. This New York Times article ties in very well with the Joys of Motherhood.


For both these women micro-financing would have given them more Independence and would have not let the men have as much control over them. While their tribe and society values were very set in their own ways if changes happened slowly they would have been eventually accepted. Especially because these programs would help bring more money into the hands of women which means more money would be spent on nutritious food, health care, and on children. It would also increase the standard of living overall.